Question to find your real ones:

Who are your Winter Friends?

There are two types of friends:

1. Summer Friends are the ones who are there for you when it's warm and sunny, but disappear when the weather starts to turn. They are the seasonal tourists, not the locals.
2. Winter Friends are the ones who are there for you when it's cold and dark. They are the locals, who have the wisdom to know that the seasons come and go.

Most people in your life are Summer Friends, and when winter inevitably comes, they are gone.

The Winter Friends are the relationships that you really need to cultivate. Those are the people who will be there for you throughout the different seasons of your life.

You may love having both types of friends in your life, but never make the mistake of thinking your Summer Friends will be there when the seasons change.

Who are your Winter Friends?

Who are the locals that have been there for you when the weather turns?

Cherish them. Be one to someone else.

Quote on distinctiveness:

"To be yourself in a world that is constantly trying to make you something else is the greatest accomplishment." - Ralph Waldo Emerson

You have to fight to maintain your distinctiveness.

Consistently, relentlessly.

It may be hard, but it's worth it.

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Framework for simple productivity:

The 3x5 Notecard Strategy

I've tried every fancy productivity system, but I've found the painfully simple strategy that works for me:

This 3x5 notecard.

Each evening, I sit down at my desk and write down the 3-5 highest-impact to-dos for the following day. These are the "important" tasks that directly contribute to my long-term projects or goals.

The list is pure—I specifically avoid writing down all of the miscellaneous urgent and unimportant to-dos (more on that later).

In the morning, I sit down at my desk for my first focus work block and start at the top of the list, working my way down and crossing off the important items as I get through them.

My primary goal is to cross each item off the list by the end of the day.

I am intentionally conservative in the number of items I write on the list. It's usually 3, sometimes 4, and very rarely 5. I never want to end the day with open items, so being conservative helps me accomplish that (and get the extra rush from getting through more than I expected).

As I go through the day, I stole an idea from Marc Andreessen to use the back of the card to write down and cross off any minor to-dos that I complete (the urgent or unimportant tasks that are not welcome on the front of the card).

The process of writing and crossing off an item on the back of the card is a further boost of momentum, so I find it to be a worthwhile exercise.

My notecard productivity system is painfully simple, but it's grounded in five powerful realizations:

1. 15 minutes of prep in the evening is worth hours the next morning. By setting out your priority tasks the night before, you eliminate any friction from having to decide what to work on. You hit the ground sprinting.
2. Important > Urgent. By tackling the important to start the day, you guarantee progress against the big picture projects and goals. If my day went to hell after that morning focus block (which it sometimes does with a 1-year-old at home!), it would be ok, because I know I've gotten through much of my important work.
3. Momentum is everything. Crossing important items off your list to start the day immediately creates a winning feeling that you keep with you. Success begets success.
4. Simple is beautiful. The fanciest productivity systems often require a lot of thinking and maintenance. If you're spending time thinking about your productivity system, you're studying for the wrong test. That's movement for the sake of movement. You should be focused on progress.
5. Find what works for you. It used to stress me out that I didn't have a beautiful productivity system that would impress others. Then I realized that whatever works for me is the best productivity system. Identify how you operate and find the system that works for you.

To get started, just buy a stack of simple 3x5 notecards (I use these fancy ones) and give it a shot. If you've ever been overwhelmed by productivity systems and advice, this is an approach to try.

Tweet to warm your heart:

If this doesn't warm your heart, nothing will...

Article on addition through subtraction:

​When I Stopped Trying to Self-Optimize, I Got Better​

Great, short read on the perils of tying your self worth into a binary achievement.

As I wrote in The Dark Side of Big Goals, when we place so much weight on a successful outcome, we set ourselves up for unhappiness.

When you strip away all of that focus on optimization, you can center on the purity that remains.

The article references a beautiful quote on perfection:

"Perfection is achieved not when there is nothing more to add but when there is nothing left to take away, when a body has been stripped down to its nakedness." - Antoine de Saint-Exupéry